Tag Archives: boredom

However “Ever After” Goes

However “Ever After” Goes

The excitements purge and the dust settles
Time, taking its measurements in re-runs
And the shows aren’t even worth showing
Extra loud repetitions blaring the soundtrack to life’s mediocrity
Its meaninglessness so shrill in pitch
And did you know boring yourself to death is a noisy endeavor?
The laundry’s staled. Mildewed, despite re-starting the cycle fifty-eight times over
Three days have gone by? Add soap push start and forget about it
Over and over and over
Was marriage designed to be this hard?
Does everybody do it? Do you know what I mean?
Matrimony, the eternal scream and it’s a lot like the laundry these days; a bunch of bullshit I’d rather not do
With its moldy stench of unfinished business, of apathy, of not giving a damn, of dying another pointless death every time I get out of bed
I want to see him feel empty for once, stop giving a fuck, shit or get off the pot, give the whole thing up
As masterfully as I have
In the earlier days (before the TV sets died in the permanent-seeming on position)
I was the same, yet a different person
Alive, electric
Before peace caved in and lost its spine
I was in motion
Bidding my life to the proof of my worth
(as I thought it’d need proven)
By “doing my part”
With a permanent grin
Walking in such an effortless spirit of perpetual excellence
Prune-shriveled fingers yet manicured hands
Ironic how (while feigning confused disappointment) he now likes to remind me of what a cool person I was then
Before I quit wiping his piss off the floor in my boy shorts, before I quit wearing those sexy bandanas in my hair, before I learned how to kill him with my eyes, before my imagination died and the horizon collapsed, taking me hostage by the brutalities of domesticity implicit in being the chauvinist’s wife
I was cool.
I was a prized fighting champion with manners and class on my knees and hands scrubbing my way through the American (or my imaginary) Dream

Life is divided in two, but no one ever tells you
that the middle can suck you into itself
a black hole; an anti-matter; a one way ticket to the realization that you grew up to become a nobody

There’s a red sheet whipping in the winds of change, gripped by the hands of resistance
You can’t be the bull and the ringleader too
And so I dance, I dance my midlife away
While the gringo masters the art of futility
His every breath a burning desire to see me tamed
Hopes should never be set so high; birds are not born for a cage


Open Your Eyes

Open Your Eyes

Many people are tamed by the realities they believe they are “living in.”

Many people are dying, not living.

Many people are lost in a world they perceive to be inhospitable, lonely, and full of evil.

Many people have grown into the very thing they spent every moment of their youth fearing and resisting.

A huge percentage of the people with whom I’ve crossed paths is convinced that life is something that happens TO them…

When did everybody fall asleep? And how do we wake them up? How do you convince someone that the very peace they feel abandoned by is SITTING RIGHT WITHIN THEM?

Life is not by chance. Your life, specifically, has a purpose. If you’ve lost your sense of wonder, or you feel like nothing is meaningful enough to work hard for, or exciting enough to feel motivated for, let me ask you: what are you still doing here?

If you suffer from clinical depression, I understand that words and ideas may not cure your indifference. This post is not for you.

For everybody else, SNAP OUT OF IT!!! Look around you. Where are you? What brought you here? What keeps you here? Life is a perpetual motion, initiated by the very frequency–that is, vibrational ENERGY–of our spirit. What happened today is a direct result of what thoughts and feelings we allowed to dwell within us yesterday. If you spend your day in REACTIVE mode, waiting for things to happen, good or bad, so that you can decide if you enjoy the life you’re living, then you will never enjoy your life.

I compel you to step outside the box for a change. Get up, go outside, and walk around for awhile. Think about what matters to you. What your talents are. How you could use them to make a difference in this world. Absorb its beauty as you walk through it…

When you do that, your core energy shifts from a place of waiting to a place of manifesting. Be the change you wish to see in this world. Make something beautiful. Listen to music that moves you. Get up and dance to it. And then re-learn the sound of your spirit’s voice. Listen to it, act on it, and watch your life unfold in perfect harmony before you.