Category Archives: government

Try This On For Size

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When the people fear the government, there is tyranny. When the government fears the people, there is liberty.

Thomas Jefferson

thoughts like propellers
propel themselves forward
and pull me behind them
I’m thinking-enslaved

over-analyzations like an addiction, work further and deeper the old familiar creases and circular patterns
ruts in the mud
terrain unordained

look at me now
how far I’ve come without traveling straight
flying down the winding roads
never holding the wheel
seldom checking the brakes
I told you so
rearview mirrors have no place
in me
belonging always to the now
to the slowing down of a lifetime’s haste
to the constant change, the elusive thing that most can’t take

and here I am
with my blackberry brain
ripening on the windowsill
pickling like eggs
nestled in the folds; the wrinkling surface; the gray-matter space where intellect can be measured, tucked in and tethered to some tangible notion that cannot be faced

you’ll find me there — if you catch yourself so inclined to look —
singing joy in the mornings with the multitude; the birds, perched, chorusing the carol of my freedom song

brave
fits me like a glove
or an ungiven name
christen myself, the occasion suits me

oh wild little girl in me
“she can’t help it honey, she came to make waves”
grown fully now — isn’t it funny how
that happens, when no one’s looking —
no longer awkward, ugly, whatever-it’s-called-duckling

womanchild
in tow and submission
how could I resist them?
the endlessly coming-on of masochism; bondage; thoughts of my own; inescapable age

brittle hands of time
might tie me down
but cannot tame

the stars, too
I see them without counting
I never did keep score
for that, they’ve taken an oath
they have sworn
to testify to my defiance
shining brilliance in light
against this visible roar
screaming forth

lioness
who dared long ago to dream bigger
be careful
in thinking outside the box
your efforts of thought
only bind you to an out-of-sight out-of-mind location
in which our society keeps you

and so blacksmith I became
forming the metal with the heat of a fire, flames of fury and the hammer strikes it in place, the bars becoming pillars of a perfectionist’s prison

deafening wilderness
a madness my own
a place I feel safe

I’ve been known to break it down, those accepted modes of unthought, take that sick little box and master it, make it my bitch, put it in place, simplify it and step away (if only for a moment) cleansed

we gotta learn how to beat our own drum
broken or not
dance if we want, without music playing
make a new song, unmetered rhythms without pressure to harmonize, blend in, keep the stanzas and standards and balance maintained

write a new verse
ignore the refrain
if we so choose

because appearances are deceiving
here, in this space
the nonconformity of it feels more like liberty than any pseudo-freedoms to which civilians claim

I am free

once upon a time, though
I tried it on for size
I voted
in many ways also, I contributed to the beast
feeding his greed with my ignorance

and on my knees I discovered
I’d much rather serve a righteous King
sacrifice everything I thought mattered
and live awake in my hour, even caged by the truth
than go to sleep with a false sense of freedom, a constitutional blindness
pledging my allegiance
vowing my soul’s loyalty
to an inanimate object
that stands for anything but the individual person’s rights, pursuits, or relevance

you see, I grew up
and even if you don’t agree with me
be proud
in this day and age it’s still possible
for a girl to think for herself

and refuse to settle
for mindless pacifications
of blind leading blind