shadows of a feeling


All of the pictures collapsed to the floor. A giant thud. A violent smack. A collective sigh of bitter longing. Decorations from the long ago littering my now. Variously faces facing all the sorrow. How. It happened, while expected least. On my knees, forced to see the many deaths I’ve died in me.
All the lonely faces, calling out my former name. Haunting all my unsung songs and singing broken melodies.
The faces. All those faces.
Gone now, each and every one. A phantom of my life gone by.
Appearing as a wanting does, whispering and taking from me a sense of well being I thought I had. They take it now, those photographs. My joy is always theirs to have. Those faces. All those faces.
Like a wind against a wide-paned window, wild framed windows to my soul; their eyes, their many many eyes, and how they laugh. Come from my past, reminding me of all I lack.
The windows will not open and the blinds here are kept shut.
Above, a turtle type of dove. Just one. Flies now away. But its sadness, all its loveliness, right here in me shall stay.


About Brandy Desiree

"Call on me, and I will show you great and unsearchable things you do not know." --Jeremiah 33:3 I am a seeker. A lover. A doer. A thinker. I make music, I dance often, and I laugh. It's all hilarious, really. Everything. Look around you. My children teach me a lot about life. I have five boys, and yes I'm out of my mind. It works for me though; I think this world could honestly use just a little more crazy. A lot of humanity's problems could be solved by everybody taking themselves a little less seriously. I'm grateful and alive; a constantly evolving creature, thankful for the sunshine and just as thankful for the rain... Visit my corner of the universe and share yourself! My heart could implode with welcome for you.

12 responses »

    • Hey thanks. ๐Ÿ™‚ I love that despite my negative pendulum swinging motion, I continue to receive from people such as yourself. It’s powerful, to be heard. Feels good. I’ll be swinging back into the yin (or is it yang?) side of this pendulum soon. Offering my ear back unto you. Thanks for being here in the meantime.

    • The sun, rotational perspective, outwardly introspective, came crashing across my horizon as I read these words from you.

      A beautiful-most rising; a dawn contrasted by the nighttime of my skies.

      Oh non-vertical view, there never are words for the depth of how I miss you while the time ticks always on without your melody, soulful song.

      You come to me, ocean breeze, coastal rhythm, where the tide takes all the stars on wicked joyrides and the panoramic feelings can consume; for you, mine always do.

      I do, I do, my lady. Still yet and forevermore. Love. Cherish. Humbled and rapt. Yours.

  1. “Come from my past, reminding me of all I lack.” I was just before writing a comment on a blog about age. How as a child I wanted to grow into an old lady who loved her wrinkles. Only now, when I look in the mirror, I’m already seeing the time I’ve lost. Different, I think, from what you are saying. But the feeling somehow similar…

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